Online Adult Dating Guide

So, is it really possible to find a soul mate online through a dating service. Speaking from my own personal experience, yes it is! If you are ready to look for love online, you are most certainly not alone. There are currently millions of singles all over the world using the power of the world wide web to meet other single people.

Online dating services have changed dramatically over the years. Todays online dating services provide opportunities for people of all ages, religion, ethnic groups and geographic locations.

The problem that most singles face is not having access to other singles, and this was certainly the case for me, so many of my friends were already in happy relationships it was hard for me to meet single people. Of course I was sceptical at first, as there was still some stigma attached to online dating, however I believe that it has become more and more normal over the past year or so. For this reason, online dating is a phenomenal solution that provides access to people efficiently, conveniently and affordably.

With todays technology, you have the options to ensure your dating experience is fun and successful. If you are considering taking your first step into the world of online dating, the following tips will help you to get started.

1. Arrange to meet your date in a public place where there are plenty of other people around. Don't allow your date to pick you up from your home, at this point you shouldn't have disclosed your address anyway.

2. It's always respectful for the man to offer to pay the bill. However, it may not be a bad idea to go halves, that way your date won't expect anything in return.

3. The biggest obstacle to a person's judgement when on a date, is alcohol. Not only does it affect your judgement, but alcohol also lessens your inhibitions. It is better to either just stick to one glass or try and avoid alcohol completely on your first date.

4. Never assume that your date is safe. It's important to never let your guard down on a first date. Always tell friends or family where you are meeting your date, and arrange to ring someone when you are home safe.

5. Go with your gut instincts. If something doesn't feel right, then it probably isn't. Make your excuses and leave. Also, don't sleep with someone on at least the first three dates.

6. If you are going to exchange numbers at the end of the date, then give him your mobile number and not your home land line number.

7. No matter how much fun you may be having on your first date, always remain alert and remember to have your mobile phone with you, just in case.

8. Dating safely is very important. Remember that in the early stages of dating you are still getting to know someone that you probably know very little about. By creating a safe enviroment, you're creating a better situation for yourself.


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Discovering Infidelity - One Woman�s Story

The day I discovered my husband was cheating on me is forever etched in my mind. I will never forget my bewilderment, shock, confusion and my uncertainty about what to do next. I was totally devastated.

How I Found Out

As a freelance journalist and editor, I work from my home office. I accidentally stumbled onto Frank’s infidelity while doing interviews for an article assignment for a women’s magazine. To insure the accuracy of my notes, I always tape my interviews using a recording device attached to my office phone. While transcribing the interview tapes, I was shocked to find that I’d unknowingly recorded a number of incriminating phone calls made by Frank from our bedroom extension. Interspersed between the interviews, were revealing conversations he’d had with or about the women with whom he was involved.

A Perfect Marriage

That Frank might be cheating on me was the farthest thing from my mind, even though his behavior had been a little unusual the past few months. When infidelity did cross my mind, it was just a fleeting thought -- one I dismissed as quickly as it occurred. It was so far-fetched that I didn’t even give it serious consideration. Frank and I had an exceptionally good marriage (or so I thought). People who knew us -- even strangers, (male and female) often commented on what a “perfect couple” we were. I wrote relationship articles which appeared regularly in women’s magazines and earned me frequent guest spots on Good Day New York and several nationally syndicated radio talk shows. Our marriage (my second and Frank’s third) was the envy of all our friends. Still, I was at a loss to explain some of the odd little things Frank had recently said and done. Nothing major -- just small insignificant things that were out of character for him and didn’t seem to make any sense. I chalked it up to male menopause (Frank was nearing 50) or stress from the heavy overtime he’d been working. Little did I know that these seemingly inconsequential things would turnout to be telltale signs.

Right Under My Very Nose

From the conversations on the tapes, I discovered that Frank had not one, but three lovers. I was dumb-founded to hear him boasting to a friend about his weekend morning “quickies” with Alexis, his early departures from work for afternoon trysts with Michelle, Marlene’s weekend stay at our apartment while I was away on a business trip and more. Even more astounding, was that all these things had taken place right under my very nose. In light of my discovery, I now saw Frank’s behavior through different eyes. And I became keenly aware of how many telltale signs I’d missed. Many of the odd things Frank said and did suddenly began to make sense.

Wendy’s Story- Another Infidelity Victim

On one tape, Frank mentioned a birthday he’d recently attended which was given by his best friend Max. No other details were supplied except that the party was for Max’s girlfriend. Since Max’s wife, Wendy was a friend of mine, I told her what I heard. Working one single piece of information, Wendy conducted what I consider to be a masterpiece of detective work. In less than 2 weeks, she managed to find out the name of Max’s girlfriend, her phone number and address, where she worked, the address and phone number of her job, and was able to pinpoint approximately how long the affair had been going on. Wendy also found out exactly where and when the birthday party had taken place, how much it cost, the names of several guests who attended, and verified that that Max was indeed the person who arranged and paid for the event. She even confiscated a gift for Max’s lover that he’d hidden in the trunk of his car. Since Wendy and Max co-owned a business, she immediately took steps to protect herself financially by transferring the bulk of their joint funds to a separate account -- much to the surprise (and embarrassment) of Max when he attempted to withdraw funds without her knowledge. Their marriage survived -- largely because instead of sitting back and being a passive victim, Wendy immediately searched for confirming telltale signs. She found them early enough to take positive action and get her marriage back on track.

If Only I’d Recognized the Signs

Discovering that Frank was cheating was truly devastating. Being a naturally trusting person, I was oblivious to most of the telltale signs, despite the fact that they were staring me in the face. I later learned that many telltale signs begin to crop up when a man first starts think seriously about infidelity. For months I agonized over how things might have turned out differently if I’d recognized the signs when they first began to appear. It’s possible that I might have been able to save our marriage if I’d known the significance of those signs. If not, I could have at least saved myself a lot of heartaches and pain by preparing myself mentally and emotionally, and protecting myself legally and financially from a marriage that ultimately ended in divorce. Yet, my marriage was not unique in this respect. It was one of the millions of marriages impacted by extramarital affairs.

9 Years of Research and a Promise

At the time there were less than 5 books available on the subject of infidelity. Desperate for information, I endured the embarrassment of purchasing them at my local bookstore. As I struggled to make sense of what was happening, I began earnestly researching the topic of infidelity so I could find out how to handle the situation. My research led to my writing a series of infidelity articles based on information gleaned from leading marriage and family therapists. Although I gained a wealth of knowledge about and coping with infidelity and recognizing the telltale signs, for me, this knowledge came too late. Frank and I eventually got a divorce. But I promised myself that when I recovered from the trauma of that experience, I would share this information with other women in similar situations.

The Infidelity Statistics are Shocking

It was shocking read the statistics citing how widespread infidelity is. Though they vary from study to study, the most widely accepted figures indicate that between 50 and 70 percent of married men (between 38 and 53 million men) have cheated or will cheat on their wives. One study found that 2/3 of the wives (26 to 36 million women) whose husbands were cheating had no idea their husbands were having an affair -- largely because they failed to recognize the telltale signs. Yet the media continues to treat infidelity as a form of entertainment. Movies, novels, soap operas, talk shows, gossip columns and women’s magazines continue to dramatize, trivialize and glamorize extramarital affairs. Few people other than its victims take it seriously.

An Infidelity Book is Born – Gathering More Facts

Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs is the first of a series of information products for women who are victims of infidelity. It’s based on not just my personal experience, but on 9 years of in-depth research on the topic of infidelity. I’ve read thousands of accounts of infidelity, interviewed hundreds of women about their personal experiences and the experiences of women they know, and dozens of cheating men. I’ve read hundreds of articles, studies and transcripts on infidelity and spent countless hours surfing the Net checking out websites, chat rooms, forums, message boards and discussion lists that deal with infidelity and related issues. Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs is the result of all those efforts. It’s the book I wish I’d had when those first telltale signs began to crop up in my marriage. If I’d recognized those signs early on, things might have had a different ending.

A Multitude of Telltale Signs

Is He Cheating on You? is probably the largest collection of telltaIe signs ever compiled. It documents hundreds of signs of infidelity, including a multitude of little-known telltale signs not listed anywhere else. Despite the subtitle, it actually contains 950 telltale signs. Even after the cover was designed, I continued to add telltale signs until the final version of the manuscript was sent to the printer. And readers continue to e-mail or phone me with telltale signs that were not included in the book. What’s different about Is He Cheating on You? is that it tells women how to spot the warning signs of infidelity without using gadgets, surveillance equipment or private investigators. All of the telltale signs documented in Is He Cheating on You? can easily be found by any woman using only her eyes and ears, her personal knowledge of her husband and the information provided in the book. No special skills or equipment are needed. The signs are conveniently grouped into 21 categories so a woman can easily find the signs that apply to her husband or her marriage. A few of the signs are listed in more than one category so that no one will miss an important telltale sign.

Sharing Information with Other Women

This book, and my website www.IsHeCheatingOnYou.com are my way of sharing all the information I gathered about infidelity, with other women in this traumatic situation. It’s unfortunate that any woman would ever need a book like this, but the facts speak for themselves. Millions of acts of infidelity go undetected every day. Unsuspecting women need an easy-to-use, reliable, inexpensive tool to help them find out the truth about what’s going on.

Empowered by Knowledge

Knowledge is power; and I firmly believe every woman should know how to recognize the telltale signs of infidelity. The future of her marriage may well depend on her ability to recognize the telltale signs in time. There’s nothing worse than not knowing-- or being the last to know. But the first step in solving a problem is knowing that the problem exists. If a woman doesn’t know her husband is cheating, there’s little that she can do. If she’s oblivious to the fact that her marriage may be in jeopardy, by the time she finds out what’s happening, it may be too late. She will have had no chance to try to get her marriage back on track, or to prepare herself emotionally or protect herself from the devastation that lies ahead. Rather than being proactive and making conscious decisions about what to do, she’ll become a helpless infidelity victim, swept along with the tide.

A Fighting Chance to Save the Marriage

On the other hand, if a woman recognizes the telltale signs and understands what’s happening, she stands a fighting chance of being able to nip the infidelity in the bud on her own, or seek professional help. More importantly, she can take steps to prepare herself mentally, financially and legally for the possibility that her marriage may come to an end. At least she won’t be taken by surprise, and end up being the “last one to know”.

Who This Book Is For

Is He Cheating on You? is not just for wives who suspect their husbands of cheating. It’s also for:

• the millions of unsuspecting wives who’ve never even considered that an affair might be going on.
• women who’ve been cheated on in the past want to make sure it doesn’t happen again,
• women who are trying to reconcile with a cheating husband and want reassurance that the affair is no longer going on
• women who think it could NEVER happen to them (no one is immune)
• women who know their husbands are cheating and want to get solid proof
• women who want to know ahead of time what to look for, in case it ever happens to them
• women who in view of the high infidelity statistics want to know where they stand in their current relationship
• single women who want to avoid entering into or staying in a relationship with a cheater
• Men who suspect their wives of cheating (many of the signs are universal and apply to both sexes),
• people with female friends or relatives who are being cheated on and who are in denial
• people who don’t know how to tell a woman her husband is cheating – give her the book and let her find out for herself

No Marriage is Immune to Infidelity

One of the most surprising things I learned about infidelity is that no marriage is immune. Infidelity knows no boundaries. “Good husbands” can cheat. Infidelity can occur even in happy marriages. It can affect couples of any race, creed, color or economic background. Rich or poor, young or old, newlywed or approaching a fiftieth anniversary – infidelity can happen to anyone – even you. The likelihood is very high that, given the current statistics on infidelity, every woman will experience being a victim of infidelity at some point in her life. So I feel strongly that Is He Cheating on You? is a reference book that belongs on every woman’s bookshelf. This is important information that no woman should be without. The future of her marriage may one day depend on her ability to recognize the telltale signs in time. Armed with this book and her personal knowledge of her husband, she’ll be able to easily spot the warning signs.

The Purpose of This Book

The purpose of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs is not to make women suspicious of their husbands. The purpose is to make women aware of what’s already going on. Statistics prove that infidelity is happening all around us. Just pick up a newspaper or listen to the nightly news. Infidelity touches 80% of all marriages. It is my sincere hope that this book will open the eyes of the millions of women who are unaware that their husbands are having an affair. It was written to make women aware of the many telltale signs that indicate possible infidelity. Every woman deserves to know the truth. It’s my firm belief that if more women knew how to recognize the signs of infidelity, more marriage could be saved. With Is He Cheating on You? every wife now has an affordably priced tool to keep her from being the last to know.

A Final Word

To any woman who suspects her husband of cheating, I implore you - for your peace of mind, for your physical health (think HIV/AIDS and other STDs), for your mental and emotional well-being, and for the future financial well-being of yourself and your children too -- find out if what you suspect is true. Don’t speculate – investigate! Take it from someone who has lived through infidelity – find out before it’s too late. Believe me, in this day and age, you can’t afford to be the last one to know.

*Frank, Marlene, Michelle, Alexis, Max and Wendy are not their real names. For legal reasons, the names have been changed to protect the guilty as well as the innocent.

NOTE: Despite my traumatic experience with Frank, the story does have a happy ending. I’ve been happily re-married for 4 years now, to a wonderful man who also values the sanctity of marriage as highly as I do. (Ironically, he too, was cheated on, with disastrous and traumatic results.)

© 2004 Ruth Houston All rights reserved.
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Christian Help For Troubled Marriage

Most couples wait to seek Christian counseling until their relationship is almost beyond repair, with one or both spouses planning to move out, or both ready to simply call it quits and divorce.

For those of you afraid that your marriage is spiraling down to this level, you must immediately begin doing something about it in advance before it's too late.

What are the signs to keep an eye out for in your marriage, that'll let you know that christian help for trouble marriage is required?

To read the complete article on Christian Help for Troubled Marriage, check out: Christian Help for Troubled Marriage

Typically, you will notice these symptoms if a rift is developing in your marriage:

* There is a clear distance in your relationship, that seems impossible to bridge

- You have deep feelings of loneliness, even when you're together

- You do not feel like your spouse pays attention to whatever you say

* The sexual intimacy has left the relationship

* You fail to be together as a couple any longer

* Conversations between the two of you have died down, and when there is communication, it seems as if you aren't on the same page

Each of these warning bells can be inverted, signifying that your partner might experience some of these elements, and that would mean that your marriage is in danger also.

Discussing this list of issues in a marriage, with your partner, and asking them if they are picking up any of these identifiers, or experiencing any of these feelings that point to trouble in the marriage is essential.

It's important to have this conversation calmly, and not getting defensive.
You have reached the stage where you must be truthful with yourself and determine if it's time to get Christian Help For Troubled Marriage.

Your marriage may depend on attaining help immediately, if either you or your partner feel that the marriage is in serious trouble.

Just a reminder, that I have the complete article of Christian Help for Troubled Marriage, that you may like to Take a look at: Christian Help for Troubled Marriage

The worst thing that could happen would involve either you or your spouse reaching the edge of the cliff and walking away before you can get some help!

Couples who are prepared to seek christian help for troubled marriage, can be confident that their shared faith and belief in God, is a powerful tool, to help them through this challenging period going to take the big step of getting Christian counseling, you have your mutual love for God working in your best intentions.

No matter of the origins of the problems in the marriage, your christian faith has the ability to strengthen your connection with your spouse.

You and your spouse were purposely brought together by God, and sticking to your christian faith, will help you remember this
It's important to understand that trouble in a marriage does not necessarily need to end in divorce.

For those of you willing to pull together, concur that difficulties exist, and take the remedies together head on, really powerful Christian help for troubled marriage is available.

Where do you go when you're looking for Christian marriage counseling?
There are a variety of resources available at your church, including christian counselors, other church officials, and your pastor, that can provide useful information, if you discuss your feelings with them.

If they don't feel qualified to help you, most likely they'll give you names of counselors who are.
Christians and non-Christians alike can face the same types of marital issues, but it may be more of a help for you to share and discuss your deepest feelings, and receive counseling advice, from someone who shares your faith.

Christian counselors are trained to help you utilize your faith as a bonding agent that can fix problems and restore the love in a once-troubled marriage.

I trust that you liked this article, I also have a review of a great product that you might want to check out here: Cucan Pemo Bring Back a Lost Love Review

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Is There Hope For Our Marriage After Separation?

Our marriage was strong for many years. Then things just seemed to nosedive. We were able to work together to get the kids out of school but once they were gone our marriage just seemed to fall apart for lack of purpose. We're separated now even though we know we still love each other. Is there anything we can do to make our marriage work? Is there any hope for our marriage after separation?



It seems that you have two very important elements working in your favor here: time together and love. The fact that you still love each other even though you're separated is a huge good sign in your favor. You might not think you are able to live together anymore and you may have had more than your feel of bad blood between you in recent months but there is also a long history filled with a lot of love.



The empty nest marital problems are much more common than most people realize. It comes from putting your children before your marriage for a long number of years. When the children are gone you find that you've grown apart and only seemed to have had the children, and your love for them, in common all these years. It's a sad moment for you both and for your marriage but it doesn't have to be the end.



Here are a few things you can do that will give you both a new outlook when it comes to your marriage, each other, and the love you still have – no matter how deeply you've buried it.



1) Start dating – each other - again. You don't have to give up your separated status to enjoy a date night or two each week to reconnect and get to know the people you've become. It can be a critical step in learning whether or not you really want to save your marriage.



2) Talk about the past, the future, and what's going on with the two of you today. Discuss the dreams you shared for the future in the past and ask the really tough questions like "what went wrong?" You might find that it was more than the wrong priorities that led to your separation. More importantly, you might learn what you could do to fix the situation.



3) Consider working things out. It might seem too big to contemplate for the moment – as much as you might want it. But that doesn't mean you can't work things out and make your marriage work.



Finding the right roadmap to help you find your way back to each other is a huge undertaking unless you know where to look. You can get your ex back and replace your lost relationship with something much deeper and better connected. You just need the right set of directions to get you there.


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Make Your Marriage Better by Staying True to Yourself

My marriage had hit the rocks and I just didn’t understand! I had given our relationship first priority. In fact, when my husband & I were thinking of things to do or places to go, I rarely suggested anything to the contrary to what my husband wanted to do. (I know, it was pretty ‘old school’ of me).

I sought good relationship advice from a variety of sources and tried to do what people had suggested, even if it meant I had to change how I felt about something. But, boy, I was failing miserably in pleasing my husband. I just didn't understand him or what was happening to our marriage.

I even thought that maybe if my husband were to change, our marriage would immediately improve. But, alas, he just wasn't getting around to it! Oh, I know he was a great guy before I married him (and after too), but somehow the spark had gone out of our marriage.

Can you now spot what I was doing wrong in the first few years of my marriage? (Okay, I’ll admit it! It did take me a little bit longer than that before I wised up.)

I suppose it crept into my marriage because I felt that I didn't have what it took to be a good wife. I was trying extra hard to please my husband in order to make him happy.

I discovered I was changing into someone else. Someone I thought my husband would like better! Believe me, change is good. But when you're changing from the person your spouse married into someone else just to please him or her - it's not the smartest thing to do. Duh! After all, my husband would have not asked me to marry him if he didn't like me in the first place!

I actually withdrew myself from our marriage when I just concentrated on what I thought my husband wanted and gave no consideration to myself. That made our marriage weaker. Instead, I simply should have accepted myself as I was and spoke up for my wants, desires and likes and dislikes. Then our marriage would have been strong and equal.

Hopefully, it will not take you as long to discover this or maybe you already knew better! But, if you happen to see a wife who goes around with a long, sour face maybe you could clue her in. Thanks! She doesn't have to lose herself in order to please her husband; in fact, it's best if she finds herself to be the same person as when she got married!

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Stop A Divorce � Separation

Divorce is one of the hardest things a person can go through, the destruction of a couple has in it the power to destroy the individuals and it sometimes takes a long time and a lot of energy to get back on your feet and start living again. We all know that divorce is usually something that develops over time, that the initial gaps grow wider and wider and eventually cause the couple to separate from each other, many times this is the last break finally resulting in divorce.

One thing that happens in many couples is the separation phase that is usually the clear indicator that something is seriously wrong in the relationship, and the reaction to separation is as hard as it is to any bad news. There are many approaches to separation and many ideas about what good or what bad may come out of an initial separation, there are those who say that this is actually the first step in divorcing, other say it is the first step to negotiation and talk.

The idea of separation is usually brought up by one of the partners and this creates a situation in which one side is on the initiative and another is forced into an agreement position, but this is not so, a separation has in it many small details that need to be agreed on, especially if there are kids involved and there are many points and issues that needs to be discussed and addressed as the couple maintains a distance.

As a general rule, if you are suggested the idea of separation try your best not to overreact and to understand that this is the other side way of dealing with things, losing control when this is suggested usually just makes things worst and creates a sort of desperate situation in which many things are said and regretted soon after. Do not push yourself into a corner, remember that there is a chance that your partner will want his or her own space and will ask for a separation, this time will give both of you time to think and reassess the situation.

There are a lot of things you can do in this time of the separation and there is a lot of time for the other side to think about life without you, the time can be used to create a nicer and friendlier atmosphere between the couple and create a new beginning, which is not forced but chosen by each of the partners, since you will be separated you will each have the power to choose if you want to meet and for how long. You can control the frequency of your meetings, and the time you spend together, you can use this to try and show your good sides and the part in you that wants to save the partnership.

To stop a divorce you will need a lot of strength and determination, but it is possible to do, do not let a simple request for a time off send you into an uncontrolled anger attack, try and use each move to your benefit and plan your moves as you save your marriage and stop your divorce.

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