7 Steps to Repairing Your Marriage

Thursday, June 20, 2013

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Every marriage suffers from arguments and differences that can turn into big marital problems. Couples feel the need to always beat the other person with arguments and keep tabs on their wins and losses. But what separates the successful marriage from a disastrous marriage is the ability to repair your marriage.
Fixing a marriage is no small feat. Yet couples need to continuously work towards a healthy relationship because marriage cannot fly on autopilot. Here are 7 steps on how to repair marital mistakes that have arisen from a lack of communication and emotional support.
Step 1: Don't be afraid to apologize.

Be genuine and sincere with your apology. You will be surprised how far a heartfelt apology can go in a relationship. This is because your spouse wants the marriage to work, and hates the fighting as much as you do. Be the stronger person and repair the hurt any arguments or differences caused.
Step 2: Share your feelings.

Many couples think that somehow, their partners can read their minds. This can cause a lot of misunderstanding. So be honest and share your feelings that are underneath the anger such as fear, embarrassment, or insecurity. Confiding in your spouse is the first step towards a truly trusting, intimate relationship.
Step 3: Acknowledge your partner's point of view.

This doesn't mean you have to agree with it; just acknowledging your partner's point of view and understanding why they did what they did or said what they said can immediately bring the tone from conflict to resolution. Listen to them because often times, you'll have missed something important.
Step 4: Accepting responsibility.

Both sides carry the responsibly, and regardless of how big your involvement was, accept your responsibility of the conflict. Be open to resolving your arguments and differences rather than being defensive and counting the number of wins you have.
Step 5: Solve it together.

Whatever argument or differences there are, you are a couple, and couples solve problems together. Figure out what is causes conflict in your relationship and find out the how to work towards fixing it. This opens up communication and lets both sides have their input on what works and what doesn't.
Step 6: Change your behavior.
Continuous arguments and differences mean one thing: you need to change your behavior or the fighting will continue. Saying I'm sorry then repeatedly continuing offensive behavior only takes away trust. Know what your mistakes were, what your responsibilities were, and keep on improving yourself.
Step 7: Acknowledge the effort.

Couples should always encourage and show appreciation for each other in every stage of their marriage. Being able to talk about what marital problems you are facing, and then making the necessary changes to fix those problems is important - but being able to see those changes and acknowledge them makes the process much more fulfilling and shows how much you really want your marriage to work.
Most all marriages have their share of problems. But proactive and constructive communication is a key factor in deciding what marriages are successful, and which are not. Always be mindful that your spouse wants it to work, even if you just had a huge argument, and make sure to implement the 7 steps together as a couple to overcome marriage problems.
Relationships require two people to continuously work at it. Arguments, doubts, and fear are common in most relationships. Make sure you use those hardships to grow stronger together and not fall apart. Any relationship can be repaired. Continuous curiosity and attraction is a key part of maintaining a healthy relationship. Visit 1000 Questions for Couples to read more about 1000 personal questions designed for couples to ask each other to strengthen their relationship.


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